When Chiriko got Drunk
by Ru Sigil
Summary: When happens when Chiriko raids Tasuki's alcohol Stash. The unthinkable happens....unstoppable chaos CHAPTER 2 UP!!!
1. Default Chapter

Title: When Chiriko Gets Drunk  
  
Warnings: tons of swear words, a drunk Chiriko and severe trauma and damage suffered by the Seishi (ok, maybe that's a little exaggerated, but….)  
  
Teaser: What happens when Chiriko raids Tasuki's alcohol stash. The unthinkable happens…(Korat grins evilly)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi…the truth always hurts…..*sob*  
  
1 When Chiriko gets drunk  
  
It was a beautiful morning in Konan country. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, the sky was blue, and everything was peaceful.  
  
Then half the Konan palace erupted in flames.  
  
"LEKKA *hic* SHINIEN! *hic*"  
  
A hyperactive mini Seishi ran down the corridor's of the Konan Palace, with an enraged Tasuki in pursuit.  
  
"CHIRIKO! OI!!!!! GIVE MY #$@!*&^ TESSEN BACK!!!!!!"  
  
A certain red haired bandit was pissed off—VERY pissed off. Not only was half his precious stash of sake was in ruins, His beloved tessen was being violated by a very hyperactive Seishi. Chiriko, out of all the Seishi, Chiriko, the calm, cool and quiet one. And the one with the most common sense supposedly, considering his gift from Suzaku was wisdom.  
  
Well, his impression of Chiriko was different now.  
  
And Chiriko continued his rampage of destruction throughout the palace.  
  
"LEKKA * hic* SHINNEN!!!!"  
  
Following Chiriko's cry, a mighty wall of flames burst from the tessen and engulfed the surrounding trees, reducing it to ash.  
  
All of Tasuki's attempts to stop the youngest Seishi were useless, he needed superhuman strength to stop Chiriko.  
  
Superhuman strength….  
  
NURIKO! Of course! Surely the crossdresser could help him—if he wasn't awake from the racket caused already. That guy could sleep through an attack from Kutou if he had the chance.  
  
By then, all of the Seishi except Nuriko had woken up and were trying out their own unique methods to stop Chiriko from continuing his path of destruction.  
  
Chichiri conjured up a barrier to block Chiriko from going any further, but, to the monk's surprise, the littlest Seishi just ran straight through it and went on flaming everything in sight.  
  
Chichiri blinked in surprise.  
  
"Chiriko is very powerful when he is drunk no da!" he remarked  
  
Next was Tamahome who tried to tackle Chiriko as he went passed. The result was—  
  
"LEKKA SHINNEN!!!"  
  
And Tamahome and his money were burnt to a black crisp.  
  
Tamahome broke down into sobs.  
  
"AHHHHH!!! My money! My precious, hard-earned money!!!"  
  
  
  
Hotohori tried the more diplomatic approach.  
  
He stood right in front of Chiriko.  
  
"Suzaku Sichiseishi Chiriko, this is your brother Seishi speaking,  
  
Hotohori, the most handsome and smartest—  
  
"LEKKA SHINNEN!!!"  
  
Hotohori suffered the same fate as Tamahome and his precious money.  
  
Hotohori wailed in despair when he saw the damage done to his hair that he was so proud of.  
  
" MY Hair! My beautiful, luxuriant Hair! It's ruined!!!"  
  
Mitsukake was watching all this from a safe distance, knowing all too well not to use his powers to try and cure the drunken Seishi. Last time he tried to do it on Tasuki, the result was nothing short of undesirable.  
  
Chiriko once again lifted the tessen, his mouth opening to utter the words of fiery destruction that the remaining Seishi dreaded to hear right now.  
  
"LEKKA—"  
  
"@$#^$^%!!! NOT NOW!!!!"  
  
"CHIRIKO!! DON"T DO IT!!!!"  
  
"MY HAIR! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!!!!"  
  
"NOOOOOO!!!"  
  
But it was too late.  
  
"LEKKA, *hic* SHI—"  
  
THUNK  
  
By some sort of uncanny luck, Nuriko had just woken up, and Chiriko had run straight into a pole that Nuriko had placed right in front of him.  
  
And fell into a dead faint  
  
Nuriko wiped his hands on the sides of his tunic  
  
" And that's what you get from disturbing my beauty sleep!"  
  
Tasuki glared at Nuriko.  
  
"What took you so long???"  
  
Nuriko glared back.  
  
"Hey, I need my beauty sleep! I need to look good for Hotohori-sama!"  
  
Sweatdrops from the Seishi was the reply he got.  
  
Nuriko put down the 12 metre high and 2 tonne pole and knelt by the 13 year old Seishi.  
  
"Did I overdo it? Er, Chiriko??" The purple haired Seishi knelt beside the unconscious Chiriko and poked him in the side gently. Nothing happened.  
  
"C-h-i-r-i-k-o-????!!!!" A few more pokes from Nuriko. Still, nothing happened. Several more pokes did nothing to help either.  
  
Tamahome interrupted Nuriko from his poking fiasco.  
  
"It's no use Nuriko. Chiriko is going to be knocked out for quite a while considering the size and weight of that pole."  
  
Tasuki just shook his head and grinned. "Man, that kid's gonna have the biggest !##@%*&*#$ hangover ever when he wakes up!"  
  
  
  
TBC~  
  
It's done!! *korat does little dance* And my first Fushigi Yuugi fanfic too!!! *does little dance again*  
  
Thank you so much for reading!  
  
I'm doing a second chapter on when Chiriko wakes up and sees the reaction of the Seishi. Please tell me what you think.  
  
*bows*  
  
Thank you for reading and reviews are VERY welcome!  
  
^.^  
  
KoRat~~* 


	2. Chapter 2--The aftermath

Title: When Chiriko is on a High  
  
Warnings: tons of swear words, a drunk Chiriko and severe trauma and damage suffered by the Seishi (ok, maybe that's a little exaggerated, but….)  
  
Category: Humor  
  
Spoilers: NONE  
  
Teaser: What happens when Chiriko raids Tasuki's alcohol stash. The unthinkable happens…(Korat grins evilly) SECOND CHAPTER UP!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi…the truth always hurts…..*sob*  
  
When Chiriko gets drunk  
  
Chapter 2.  
  
*5 Hrs Later* (approx 12:24pm afternoon.)  
  
Amid the smoking ruins of the Konan Palace, the sun was still shining, the sky was blue, (excluding the constant smoke that filled the air), the birds were silent and everything was 'peaceful'.  
  
Then a wail broke through the silence.  
  
"NOOOOO! My Okane! My beautiful Okane! My one and ONLY love! GONE! GONE forever!!!!!! NOOOOOO!MY PREC—"  
  
That woke the unconscious Chiriko as well as the dead.  
  
"What? What was that ? sounded like Tama—OW!!"  
  
Chiriko sat up all of the sudden, rubbing his throbbing head.  
  
A deep voice interrupted his thoughts.  
  
"Careful there Chiriko, you had a pretty hectic day so far."  
  
"Mitsukake? Why are you h—"  
  
Chiriko's eyes widened as he took in his surroundings. The seishi were all standing around him, all looking at him with odd expressions on their faces, amid the smoking ruins of the Konan Palace. He'd never seen so much destruction in his life! That could only mean…..  
  
He grabbed Mitsukake's hand, words tumbling from his mouth.  
  
"Oh great Suzaku, Kutou attacked didn't it, where's Miaka, how is she, and Kotou haven't called out Seiryuu yet have they? Have they? HAVE THEY???"  
  
It was Hotohori that answered. The Konan emperor's once luxuriant hair was now blackened and Chiriko could smell the faint scent of smoke lingering around him. There were even a few wisps of smoke rising off the hair.  
  
"No Chiriko" He answered flatly "Kutou. Did. Not. Attack."  
  
Chiriko breathed a sigh of relief. But, then who or what was it?  
  
Realization dawned upon him. Of course, why didn't he think of it before! It was obvious! If it wasn't Kutou, It must have been…  
  
Anger welled up in him  
  
"TASUKI! I'M ASHAMED OF YOU! HOW DARE YOU DESTORY HOTOHORI-SAMA'S PALACE! YOU SHOULD HAVE MORE RESPECT FOR HIM THAN THAT!!!!!" Chiriko shouted, pointing an accusing finger at the flame-haired bandit.  
  
Tasuki responded with an icy glare. "Chiriko, your fucking symbol isn't appearing on your fucking foot now is it?"  
  
Chiriko looked puzzled for a moment. "Huh?"  
  
"Chiriko, for a fucking person gifted with wisdom from fucking Suzaku, you can be extremely stupid sometimes.." Tasuki finally exploded. "IT WAS FUCKING YOU DAMMIT! IT WAS YOU!!!!!"  
  
Chiriko looked blankly at Tasuki "er…."  
  
"YOU STILL DON'T FUCKING GET IT DO YOU?? IT WAS YOU THAT FLAMED HOTOHORI'S FUCKING PALACE. IT WAS YOU!!IT WAS YOU!!!!!!YOU GOT INTO MY SAKE STASH, DRANK MORE THAN FUCKING HALF OF IT, TOOK MY TESSEN AND FLAMED HOTOHORI'S PALACE!!!"  
  
But Chiriko crossed his arms over his little chest and answered with a strong voice.  
  
"I don't believe you Tasuki"  
  
That was the last straw for Tasuki.  
  
"GAAAHHHHH!!!! FUUUCK!!!!!! THAT DOES IT!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!!!!!"  
  
Tasuki grabbed his tessen and ran towards Chiriko, evil-intent clearly evident in his eyes.  
  
"EEP!!!" Chiriko leapt out of bed and ran for his life, with the flame haired bandit in hot pursuit.  
  
"Oh no you don't—LEKKA SHINNEN!!!!" A mighty burst of flame emitted from Tasuki's tessen, and just missed Chiriko by an inch, but destroyed what was left of the Konan palace. And received a few comments from the Seishi.  
  
"My MONEY!!!! MY Precious OKANE!!! (money)!!!!! NOOOOO!!!!!  
  
" *sigh* There goes my fishing rod, no da"  
  
"My palace!!! My beautiful palace!!!!"  
  
"I'm sorry Heika, but my powers cannot heal your sorrow."  
  
"But I can Hotohori–Sama! with my undivided attention and love!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"AHHHHHHH!!!!!HEEEEEEELP!!!!"  
  
"LEKKA SHINEN!!!!!!"  
  
Suzaku, who were watching the Suzaku Seishi's antics from heaven, clutched his celestial head and groaned in agony and frustration.  
  
" why me god, why MEEEEEEEEEEE???"  
  
Sieryuu, who was taking a short break from trying to take over the world said, with a almighty sweatdrop on his forehead.  
  
"er, aren't you already a god???"  
  
OWARI~~  
  
Notes:  
  
If you didn't get the part when Tasuki asked Chiriko if his symbol was appearing on his foot, in the manga and thew anime series, Chiriko's powers, which was wisdom, given by Suzaku, disappears sometimes from his foot, which turns Chiriko back into a mortal. Instead of the mature child he is, he becomes a normal little kid.  
  
Okane: it means money in Jap  
  
Thank you for reading and REVIEW!!!!!  
  
^.^  
  
KoRat~~ 


	3. Notes from the author.....

NOTES FROM THE AUTHOR:  
  
Greetings  
  
Korat speaking here. Thank you very much for reading this fanfic and I hope that you have enjoyed it…  
  
I'm planning to do more Fushigi Yuugi fanfics (humor) but I'm not sure what to write….  
  
Just a brief note to sat that any suggestions and ideas from you guys will be very much appreciated… just put it in the reviews or e-mail me at …..  
  
Silver_korat@hotmail.com  
  
THANK YOU GUYS SOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!  
  
Gives all big hugs.  
  
KoRat~~  
  
^.^ 


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